Greater Hampton Roads Ryan White Planning Council

Membership Application Essay

There was an additional page, but its content is elsewhere in this blog. 

Setting:  I was invited to apply for a board member position with the Greater Hampton Roads HIV Health Services Planning Council, seemingly after I began publicly (visible on social media) working with the Virginia Dept. of Health on policy analysis and legislative issues; and I, of course, accepted the opportunity with joy and humility. 

¿But, who do they want? 

Context:  There is truly only the multiplicity to describe me, with some folks aware of this or that aspect, and others both and neither; the myriads of form always follow a specific function. So, when I am here, then, I am not there; and thus, as long as volition is my own, I place myself in whatever configuration is most immediately desired. Hence, the risk of Being comfortable is always already measured against the troubled happenstance of reconciling contradictions; which is to say, there is a chance to confound my desire in the presentation of self by expecting an assemblage endemic to an Other. Suitably, nonetheless, I inquired about the desired and was informed to be my most authentic self; ergo, this essay is an embodiment of the conscientious application of my nearest desire.

In other words, I tried my best to get at the essence of "why I wish to become a member of..." and affirm the truth of it all...*only*"There is no I in me. Nor even this self. What, then, is there? The inner smile provoked in us by the patent nonexistence of both.”

As a scholar with specific subject matter expertise in anthropology and public health, and as an individual living with HIV, a first generation college student, and queer man with history of substance abuse whose work and life are deeply intertwined, I’ve derived a lot of comfort and hope in bearing witness to the power of community coalitions while accompanying community leaders and advocates in mobilizing to take care of one another, to act, and to engage in necessary fights around issues that have long been in existence: universal and meaningful healthcare, abolition, housing rights, equal employment, gender equality, environmental justice, and rights of marginalized communities, displaced populations, migrants and immigrants. 

I have worked alongside community leaders, activists, and health and social providers in the field of HIV and disease prevention who have long refused to accept the status quo, and have instead, created their own forms of care or reimagined the existing systems to meet emergent needs.  They have developed healthcare and support organizations, challenged, and changed how treatment and services are delivered, and demanded that society and the government pay attention and respond. They see this as a necessary, just, moral, and legitimate response to the ongoing precarity characterized by economic scarcity, civic inequality, market-based health care, and exclusionary policies. To me, this also shows us how, in the face of such precarity, people also find means of relating to each other, connecting to each other, and taking care of each other. It shows us how people are reimagining precarity and uncertainty as relational, generating circuits of social connections and belonging through the care of others. It is important to amplify these spaces and voices. This involves deep commitment and sustained action…and revolutionary love.

I am deeply committed to the survival of diversity in this world and advancement of the interest of all those living with, or at-risk of HIV. My unique life experiences and service-leadership in the HIV arena is markedly revolutionary, driven only by a desire to disrupt the situations that keep me and “mine” from attaining the highest standard of physical and mental health and wellbeing. That is, I offer an endless engagement with the powers-the-be, be they budgetary constraints, changes to the Code or culture of VA, or other medico-legal structure positioned between the work of this council and the consumers we serve.

After a quarter-century of political denial and social stigma, of stunning scientific breakthroughs, bitter policy battles and inadequate prevention campaigns, HIV/AIDS continues to spread rapidly throughout much of the world. Attention to the endemic virus has lessened over years, and screening and prevention access remains limited among the most at-risk groups. HIV testing and initiation of ART falls short across all demographics, disproportionately affecting black folks and other minorities at-risk of HIV infection. None of this knowledge is new, although folks speak about it as if it were and recycled solutions are still made of trash. Another way is possible, though, and it cost nothing. Love is what we need and how we will get there. Love is the disruptive innovation necessitating change. And at the risk of seeming ridiculous, let me say that the true revolutionary is guided by a great feeling of love. It is impossible to think of a genuine revolutionary lacking this quality. So please Be revolutionary and allow me to become a member of the Ryan White Planning Council and shake up this beLOVEd community.